She probably won't ever see this. That's okay. She knows how I feel about her. 

Her life has been a testimony of God's grace and faithfulness. And her life has been...crazy hard.

She's been abused, mistreated, lied to, cheated on, abandoned, ignored, rejected, afflicted, and broken by many people on this earth. People that were close to her. Just like He was.

But she was never alone. Ever. 

He is El Roi, the God Who Sees her.

She would say her life has been hard, but she doesn't say that in a way that seeks pity or attention. And it's not her identity. A ridiculously hard life is not her identity. 

He is her Identity.

She takes every bit of what happens to her in a peaceful, faithful stride. I promise you you've never known anyone like her. You just haven't.

She is surrendered. Like, face-in-the-soil-and-arms-outstretched surrendered to Him. She knows He loves her (in spite of all the difficulties). She trusts His hand and what He allows into her life. She praises Him no matter what. For real, people.  

He is Sovereign over her life. 

Despite how she's been treated, she is gentle, patient, loving, kind, generous, faithful. Hmm...it hits me now...fruits of the Spirit. She embodies the fruits because she is surrendered to Him and His work in and through her. Like no one else I know.

He is Fruitful in her life.

She is adorable, sweet, and funny as ALL get out. The tone of her voice, the songs she sings over voice mail, her Betty Rubble laugh,  the thing she does with her mouth when she tastes something new or is trying to figure out what's in something she's eating, and even the way she becomes Miss Bossy Pants when making dolma. It's all just overwhelming joy. 

He is her Joy.

She is the strongest woman I know - spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically. Hands down. She has ZERO competition in that area. She suffers cancer well, like a warrior. She endures decline without complaint. She's authentic and vulnerable. 

He is her Sustainer.

She listens with intent. She hears. She speaks her mind when she needs to. She is gracious and thoughtful. She understands and encourages. She supports all that is good.

She is not perfect. And so she relies on Him and His work on the cross to make her acceptable to God. And she worships Him for that. Boldly and often.

He is her Savior.

She prays like a warrior for her children, grandchildren, neighbors, friends, and people in the news. She will not give up praying. Ever. She has been the instigator for countless answered prayers for peace, protection, answers, guidance, healing, endurance, and salvation.

He is her Source.

She helps me see Him at work. She points me to Him.

Because of her life, I know Him better. 

And it's my honor to love her as Mother.


Back to the Grind

All the pomp has passed.

No more horrific images of the bloody cross, or the glowing empty tomb, no more "He is Risen!" signs. Gone are the chocolate bunnies, jelly beans and spiral ham (well, maybe just one more sandwich tonight...).

And, honestly, most people went back to work today and forgot all about Him.

But He hasn't forgotten.

He Remembers. You.

Praise His never-failing name.


For Us

Here's what happened...

He is the Perfect Sacrifice.

It's all so backward. Perfect Him. Sinful us...me.

And, it's true. He let Himself be abused, spit on, insulted, mocked, and whipped so violently that He wasn't even recognizable. 

For us. You. Me.

And then...in a move that seems even more backward...

He is Always Forgiving.

As they were mocking, spitting, insulting, violating Him. In the very moments that they were doing that, as His perfect life was fading from this earth. He forgave. And still does, today.

It's hard to comprehend. But try. 
Because it's real and it's the most important event of human history.

He was on that cross for you. And for me.

Praise His name.



They sit on my desk, catching light. Seeking light, leaning toward it. 

He is Light

So can we, seek the Light. 

He makes all things beautiful. Even us. 


He Knows...

This one's pretty simple.

Wherever you are...He knows.

Whatever you're dealing with (or not)...He knows.

Whatever you're facing...He knows.

How do I know this? Two reasons.

First, one of His names is El Roi, "the God who sees."

He Sees.

So she [Hagar, who had been mistreated by her boss, so she ran away, while pregnant, into the desert] called the Lord who spoke to her: The God Who Sees, for she said, “In this place, have I actually seen the One who sees me?” That is why she named the spring, “A Well of the Living One Who Sees Me.” It is located between Kadesh and Bered.
Genesis 16:13-14

He doesn't see some people and not others. That would be absurd! He's God - He sees everything!

If He saw her, He sees you. Wherever you are. In whatever condition you're in.

Second, He has a history of knowing where to find people. 

He comes toward us. 

Immediately He [Jesus] made the disciples get into the boat and go ahead of Him to the other side, while He dismissed the crowds. 23 After dismissing the crowds, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. When evening came, He was there alone. 24 But the boat was already over a mile from land, battered by the waves, because the wind was against them. 25 Around three in the morning, He came toward them walking on the sea. 26 When the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost!” they said, and cried out in fear. 27 Immediately Jesus spoke to them. “Have courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” 28 “Lord, if it’s You,” Peter answered Him, “command me to come to You on the water.” 29 “Come!” He said. And climbing out of the boat, Peter started walking on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the strength of the wind, he was afraid. And beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me!” 31 Immediately Jesus reached out His hand, caught hold of him, and said to him, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” 32 When they got into the boat, the wind ceased. 33 Then those in the boat worshiped Him and said, “Truly You are the Son of God!”
Matthew 14: 22-33

So, Jesus sent his disciples off in a boat, and that boat ran into a violent storm that freaked them out. And without them asking, "He came toward them". He knew where they were. He's the one who sent them on that boat. He knew the storm was coming. And at the right time, before they could even call out His name, He approached them. 

Because He knew. 

Take a deep breath. And thank Him for knowing. You're not alone. 
Praise His name!


Praying for Snow

I hate snow. But I love it. 

What I mean is that I love snow, but hate what it brings with it. I love the white, clean, glittery look of snow, but I could really do without the slush on the roads, salt on my car, and air so cold that my nostrils that stick together when I breathe outside. 

Watching it, from indoors, brings me calm and peace. It falls quietly. Gently. Effortlessly. Gracefully.  It slows me down mentally. Hearing it crunch under my boots is one of the most calming sounds I can think of, next to the voice of God.

He Speaks.

But the problem is that it doesn't snow enough. In my mind. 

My mind is full of so much noise. So. Much. Noise. Noise about colleagues who don't own their responsibilities, departmental silos, daily project 'emergencies'. Noise about dirty counter tops, carpet that needs vacuuming, toilets that need cleaning, an art table that's calling me to create. Noise about a stacks of resumes to review, lists of documents to edit, podcasts to listen to. Noise about food, fat, carbs, sugar, fructose, food allergies, my muffin top waistline, HIIT workouts, strength training, migraines, cortisol, digestive issues... So. Much. Stinkin'. Noise.  

I say I want to hear His voice, I tell Him that each morning. And I mean it.

But I let all that noise in. Hmm...if I'm honest, I bring it in. I invite it in. I let it steal my focus. I make the noise urgent. And He doesn't want that for me. Or for you.

He Speaks. He has things to say.

So, maybe, if you're feeling worn down, exhausted and drained, like me...maybe we need to take a snow day. Maybe we need to pray for a soul-blizzard to cover all the noise, shut the place down, and help us focus on what we know will bring us calm and peace.



There's something really nice about being locked in a barely full plane for twice as long as we should be, during a snowstorm.

Something about that space and silence. Being shut off from all the demands, pulls, pushes, responsibilities, and voices. Floating above all the muck and stuff below, getting a bright, clean view of something bigger than what's normally in front of me.

Something about not being able to make a phone call, text, IM, or be called out to from another room.

It simplifies things. And allows time and space to uncover the gunk that got me thinking sideways.

It's been a rough few weeks. Work. Health. Marriage. Ministry. All at once. And my mind got very sideways.

Hmm...and it emerges...

Suspended 38,000 feet in the air, locked in a metal tube, I've got nothing but faith to hold on to. Down there, on the ground I can't see through these clouds...down there, I've convinced myself I have control over what's around me. I believe the lies that it's all on me, that in order for things to work out, it's on my shoulders.

He, alone, is in control.

I just heard a preacher say that our thoughts are out of control when they're not aligned with God's word. Man, that resonated.

It's a dangerous thing: me believing I'm in control. Not dangerous like, me-jumping-out-of-this-plane dangerous. But dangerous to my heart, mind and relationship with Him. Because when I think I'm in control, anything goes...words, actions, motives, thoughts, attitudes. And that's probably what creates a lot of the muck and stuff that's on the ground.  

Sigh. This is good to know. I needed this.

So, what about you?

What have you been thinking about? Who do you think is in control of what's going on around you and in you? What does God say about that? Think it through.

We land in 45 minutes. I'm kinda wishing I was on that super long flight to Shanghai out of Gate K13. The view is nice up here.